i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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