Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize