Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
