Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
