I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize