is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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