gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
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I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I deserve this hangover.