I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
