Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Randomize
Follow @tfln