That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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