Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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