you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Actions speak louder than pants.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Randomize
