Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
handjob tips. give me some.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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