no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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