ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
