Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I need water and some morals
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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