Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Randomize
