Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
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