I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
