I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
So apparently I’m into choking now
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
