I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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