If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
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