Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
