He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I understand Curling. That high.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
