do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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