Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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