nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
and she was petting her beer can
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
