This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
