I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
