the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
