Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Randomize
