I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
