you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
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