I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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