I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize