The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
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