So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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