I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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