Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Randomize
