Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Randomize