the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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