I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
