I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
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