Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
