i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
