who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize