As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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