Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
