you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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