Just took my morning after pill in the library
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
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